Monday, December 5, 2011

4 Out Of 5 Fundamentalists Agree. Yoga Is Satanic!

Father Gabriel Amorth hates wizards and yogis
So, the evil du jour for fundamentalists seems to be yoga....oh yeah,  Harry Potter is just as evil.  That's according to, among others, 86 year old Father Gabriel Amorth.  He is a former Vatican exorcist and founder of the International Association of Exorcists.


Via Unicorn Booty:
“Practicing yoga is Satanic, it leads to evil just like reading Harry Potter,” Father Gabriele Amorth said this week.
“In Harry Potter the Devil acts in a crafty and covert manner, under the guise of extraordinary powers, magic spells and curses,” said Amorth.
As for yoga, it leads to Hinduism and “all eastern religions are based on a false belief in reincarnation,” the 86-year-old priest said.
His beliefs are backed up by that Paragon of virtue Pope Benedict, who has made similar comments about both subjects.
This is not limited to the Catholic Church.  They're all stocked up on crazy in protestant fundamental land as well.
Pastor Mark Driscoll doesn't want you to touch your magic wand
Pastor Mark Driscoll of Seattle's Mars Hill Church had this pearl of wisdom:


"Whether they know it or not, Christians who engage in yoga are participating in a religious expression that is antithetical to Christianity. The result is often an unguarded spirit that is susceptible to the many lies of Satan and a slow, almost unperceivable degradation of faith and Christian truth in one’s life. The act itself is a worship act. Subsequently, it cannot be done in a way that is not spiritual."


By the way, Pastor Driscoll also seems to have a problem with masturbation because he believes it's kind of gay:


First, masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he's watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body.


Ok, so maybe I buried the lead...Closet Case* Pastor Is Turned On By The Male Body When He Wanks**!!


*my opinion with no facts regarding the pastors personal circumstance to back this up other than this.
**I can't verify whether or not the pastor has ever wanked in his life...which may be the problem.

1 comment:

  1. I have never heard something more rediculous in my entire life!!!

    ReplyDelete